Healing The Mother Wound
Family Spread: For the children of wounded Mothers
Our relationships with our Mothers mould us—right from being in their wombs to our very existence today. This spread is dedicated to the children of Mothers who have carried hurt and wounds, perhaps unintentionally and unconsciously inflicted their pain upon you the same way they received them. The Mother Wound is more common than we think growing up in such a patriarchal society. This spread helps individuals struggling with unspoken resentment or forgiveness, to support you in developing self-understanding of your relationship with your Mother, gaining empowerment and taking steps towards healing our Mother Wound, so we don't pass on this hurt to our loved ones or future children.
Card #1: My relationship with my Mother
Card #2: What about my Mother I need to see differently
Card #3: My Mother’s wound
Card #4: My wounds inherited from my Mother
Card #5: What can I do to heal these wounds?
Card #6: How can I be a Mother to myself?
Card #7: What lesson(s) must I learn from my Mother wound?
Card #8: How will healing my Mother wound help me in
this lifetime?
WHO MAY EXPERIENCE THE MOTHER WOUND?
Children (usually daughters, but sometimes also sons) are said to experience the mother wound if their mother:
• provided support by taking care of the physical needs of the children, but didn’t give love, care, and security
• didn’t provide empathy to mirror the child’s emotions and help them label and manage those emotions
• didn’t allow the child to express negative emotions
was extra critical
• expected the child’s support with their own physical or emotional needs
• wasn’t available to the child either because they had to work or because they were busy with their own interests (Do note, however: You can be a working mom — even a working single mom — without instilling the mother wound!)
• had suffered emotional or physical abuse themselves, didn’t process the trauma, and was therefore unable to offer love and nurture
• had an untreated mental health condition
• experienced alcoholism or drug addiction
SIGNS AND EFFECTS OF THE MOTHER WOUND
If many of the feelings in the list below seem familiar, you may have a mother wound:
• Your mother just wasn’t there for you on an emotional level.
• You were reluctant to turn to your mother for comfort or security.
• You doubted you had your mother’s approval, so you were always trying to be perfect.
• You felt nervous and frightened around your mother.
• Your mother expected you to take care of her physically or emotionally.
If the points on the list above resonate with you, what does that mean for you now?
These negative feelings can lead to:
- low self-esteem
- lack of emotional awareness
- inability to self-soothe
- the feeling that warm and nurturing relationships aren’t in your reach
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